Welcome, welcome! All you ninjas!
Come on in and make some room
Move on over, now! Go- watch out for the baby head!
The baby... You about to head the baby in the head..
Now, why you gotta take up both seats? Just move on over!
Lets start the show
We have a special guest tonight... He goes by the name of chris webby
Now, this young man, hails from connecticut
And now, after six mixtapes
After half a million downloads
After 20 million youtube views
Countless sold out shows
And many a satisfied fan!
All you ninjas, give a warm welcome to your... Chris webby
Yeah, you see I’m buzzin’ now
Shovel in hand, I dug from the underground
Lyrical artillery loaded with forty-dozen rounds
They used to run they mouth, shit, they daffy duckin’ now!
Came out spittin', first photo shoot was my ultrasound
Throwin’ up my middle fingers in my mother’s uterus
Spittin’ fire off a the top, mount vesuvius
Always caught disturbin' the peace, they said I was ludicrous
Crazy, unpredictable, nutty, but never stupid, bitch
Smart guy like taj mauer, eatin’ pot brownies
On the run for killin' beats until the fuckin’ cops found me
On the loose again, apple juice and gin
Out outmaneuverin’ my enemies, leave ‘em with sutures in
Cut ‘em up, cause my flow is sharper than excalibur
Maximus, decimus, maridius to these challengers
Gladiator in the flesh, swingin' for your fuckin' neck
Slicin' up these beats, while you bitches can even cut a check
Up next, final stop, success, like…
Now hold on, now hold up, hold on now, hold on...
You gots to teach these boys how to rap..
Cause what these boys out here is doing, is not rap, it's wack!
You got to show them the multi-syllable schemes
You got to show them the air-tight flow
You got to show them, them punchlines
Now get on in there and do your thing, son!
Everything I do, I do it with heart
Werewolf with a full moon in the dark
Tear a fuckin' human apart, I’m stupidly smart
Started on the east, but my music made a westward expansion
Somethin' like lewis and clark, climbin' up the musical charts
And me fallin' off?, that’s like bullseye from daredevil losin' in darts
I’m just a crazy motherfucker
Who was bred to be a monster, since the eighties motherfucker
I’m lyrically inclined, put my spirit in my rhymes
Veins pumpin’ hip-hop, you can hear it in my lines
Rollin’ with a bunch of goons, everyday we grindin’ on
And we all spark, you can catch me up on cybertron
I am on everything, bad meets evil-er
That’s just how the cookie crumbles, motherfuckin' keebler!
Mark my teachers words, they told me that I should be mature
But now that my pockets beefed up, I’m never goin' vegan, sir
Grindin’ ‘till the fuckin’ day I stop breathin', word!